We’ve all heard of the social classes – upper, middle and lower, and more recently the BBC did a survey and broke them down even further into seven classes, ranging from the ‘Technical Middle Class’ to the ‘Precarious Proletariat’.
Here at HR Aspects Magazine, we recently learnt that the realm of business networking had been given a similar treatment by communication expert Andrew Thorp of MojoLife. With his tongue firmly in his cheek, he’s identified 13 categories of networker and warns this may make uncomfortable reading for some!
Lampstand – Stands on his own in the corner, hopes that no one will notice him or engage in conversation.
Wildebeest – Moves around in herds of his own kind, a defence mechanism against intruders.
Mystery Man – Never really tells you what he does, talks in riddles.
Magneto – Sticks close to you and follows you when you back away. No spacial awareness.
Predator – Always on the hunt for victims he can sell to. Quickly loses interest when pickings are slim and hunts elsewhere.
Human Brochure – Closely related to the Predator. Always willing to explain every aspect of his product or service in person.
Foodie – Talks and eats simultaneously and leaves legacy on your blouse or jacket.
Performer – Life and soul of the party. Loves being the centre of attention, likes people to listen rather than talk.
Super Bore – Makes time stand still, willing to share his entire back-catalogue of (long) stories.
Nerd – Really into coding and assumes you are too.
Darth Vader – Entices you over to the Dark Side, business always tough and cursed with the clients from hell.
MLM (My Life’s Mission) – Network marketer. Hell bent on reducing your bills/softening your skin/elongating your life.
Mayfly – Short life-span. Makes initial contact then disappears without a trace.
Andrew Thorp, co-founder of MojoLife added “I like to think that I’m in the 14th category – taking a genuine interest in people, asking great questions and listening attentively. But I’m sure that on more than one occasion I’ve told someone the same story twice or bored them senseless explaining the Rules of Golf!”
MojoLife offers a range of communication services including public speaking and presentation skills, presentation design, creating website copy and corporate video. For more information contact Andrew Thorp on 07968 083376 email firstname.lastname@example.org